It's election time. It's in the wind and in the sails of those pumped up inflatables we call the political classes. Not time to see any of them off the4 premises at Westminster unfortunately, but nevertheless time to call for last orders at least.

The rhetoric shines through so clearly on Gobber Brown's lips when he is in so much do-do. Pampers must be making a fortune on their No.10 deliveries these days and not just for the little sprog. Wonder what size Gobber takes? XXL no doubt.

NewLab should get a trouncing at the May 1 elections if anyone can get off their lard arses and go vote. Not that the choice is great I hear you whisper through this extended winter's chapped lips.

Gobber's Scotch Mist vs Camaroons Toffdom. What a choice!

Expect Gobber to suddenly find a loophole for us wrinklies over ending the old 10% tax band just in time to catch some cynical voting rights around a week before May 1. On top of the pensioner's fuel allowance increase for 'one year only' that would be real cynical crap.

My granny taught me to never trust a Scotsman with a dried out quiff!

Then again never trust a Toff with a slicked down bonce!

No choice these days. The political classes don't break ranks for us ordinary boys.

Wonder if Gobber was ever a fag at school? Anyway Gobber flew off to the US of A as an 'also ran' feature whilst Buggsy Bush entertains the main event: Papal presence! Not the greatest of timing for the Presbyterian's champion. Even goes to to the USA by nondescript charter plane. Make as little 'noise' as possible should keep the count at a reasonable trounce on May 1. Nice work Gobber. Time for a pampers change!

HD